Why Love Doesn’t Just Happen

In review of Deuteronomy 30:20 it says, “That you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.”

Bottom Line:

That you would make the choice to love the Lord your God, obeying and committing yourself to what he tells you. For the Lord is key to your life. If you love and obey, He will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your ancestors.

What this means to me:

I need to be completely faithful to the Lord my God, listening to his voice; obeying and committing myself to what he says, for this is the key to life and the length of my days here on earth, giving me what he has promised to the faithful ones before me.

In this world, our culture buys into this myth that love is uncontrollable, that it’s something that just happens to us. In fact, even the language that is used implies the uncontrollability of love. A phrase like, “I fell in love,” as if love is some kind of ditch. It’s like I’m walking along one day and, bam!  I fell in love. I couldn’t help myself.

What I’m learning is that’s not love. Love doesn’t just happen to me. Rather love is a choice, and it represents a commitment.

There’s no doubt about attraction: it and arousal are uncontrollable. But attraction and arousal are not love. They can lead to love, but they are not love. Love is a choice.

Given this, I must choose to love God; he will never force me to love him (Deuteronomy 30:20). I can thumb your nose at God and go a totally different way. I can destroy my life if you choose to do so. God still won’t force me to love him, because he knows love can not be forced.

This same principle is true about my relationships: I can choose to love others, but God won’t force me to love anyone.

This means that if there someone in my life, like a family member, friend, or neighbor, whom I have trouble loving, God can help me love that person if I make the choice to do so.

That doesn’t mean everything will become perfect; it doesn’t even mean that person will accept my love. But I’m the only person who can stop me from loving someone else; because love is a choice I make.

In summary, I need to make the choice to be completely faithful to loving the Lord; obeying and committing myself to what he says. This is key to my life. He will give me what he has promised to the faithful ones before me. Today I also thank you God for your reminder that loving you is a choice I need to make and not something I just fall into or happens. Moving forward, on those types of people I find trouble really caring about, I need to ask God to help me as I make the choice to start loving them.