Empathy Is an Antidote to Loneliness

In 2 Timothy 4:16-17 I read, “The first time I was brought before the judge, no one came with me. Everyone abandoned me. May it not be counted against them. But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength so that I might preach the Good News in its entirety for all the Gentiles to hear." (NLT)

Eventually, everyone experiences loneliness.

Loneliness isn’t prevented or fixed by beauty, wealth, fame, or success. Even marriage won’t protect me against loneliness. Many people marry because they’re lonely and divorce a few years later for the same reason.

The apostle Paul’s life goal, even toward the very end when he was dying alone, was for other people to know about Jesus. In 2 Timothy he talks about being brought alone before a judge. All his friends had abandoned him. But he kept his eyes focused on the spiritual needs of the people around him: “But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength so that I might preach the Good News in its entirety for all the Gentiles to hear” (2 Timothy 4:16-17 NLT).

He focused on others because he knew everyone needed to hear about God’s love. He could have focused on his own problems, but instead he looked at what he could do to help others. It kept him from being lonely, even when he was alone.

When I’m feeling lonely, don’t throw a pity party. Stop saying, “I’m alone. Nobody loves me; nobody even likes me.” For if and when I do that, I’d  just be focusing on myself.

Instead, turn my focus outward and build bridges to others. I’ll find there are a lot of lonely people who are also looking for connections.

How can I build bridges of connection? One way is by empathizing with other people’s needs. And remember to ask God to help me connect with others. Pray something like this: “Father, help me be a friend to people who need a friend.”

What’s causing loneliness in my life? Extreme seasons of transition, separation, rejection, or opposition can lead to devastating feelings of loneliness. For instance, much of the world experienced loneliness during the COVID-19 pandemic.

But don’t let difficult times keep me from reaching out to people. Look beyond my own problems and find creative ways to connect with others. Empathy is the antidote to loneliness.

In summary, everyone experiences loneliness. Loneliness isn’t prevented or fixed by beauty, wealth, fame, or success. The apostle Paul’s life goal, even toward the very end, was for other people to know about Jesus. In 2 Timothy he talks about being brought alone before a judge. All his friends had abandoned him. But he kept his eyes focused on the spiritual needs of the people around him: Paul focused on others because he knew everyone needed to hear about God’s love. He could have focused on his own problems, but instead he looked at what he could do to help others. It kept him from being lonely, even when he was alone. So when I’m feeling lonely, don’t throw a pity party. Stop saying, “I’m alone. Nobody cares.” For if and when I do that, I’d  just be focusing on myself. Instead, turn my focus outward and build bridges to others. How can I build bridges of connection? One way is by empathizing with other people’s needs. Also ask God to help me connect with others. “Father, help me be a friend to people who need a friend.” Don’t let difficult times keep me from reaching out to people. Look beyond my own problems and find creative ways to connect with others. Empathy is the antidote to loneliness.

When it appears that everyone has abandoned me, the Lord will be there with me and will give me strength. I may not feel very brave, but the Lord will give me courage. For God wants to give me the strength to do what he has commanded. This strength may not be evident until I step out in faith and actually begin to do the task. God is always there, and I am never alone. When I'm lonely, it's an opportunity to get to know God better. I can talk to him about anything, anywhere, anyplace, and he completely understands how I'm feeling.  

I’m Not Alone; I’m Part of a Family

In Romans 12:5 I read, “Christ makes us one body and individuals who are connected to each other.” (GW)

The church not only helps me center my life on God, but it also helps me connect with other believers.

God did not put me here to live an isolated life. While I’m on Earth, God wants me to learn to love others, and he wants me to practice loving others in his family. The Bible says, “Christ makes us one body and individuals who are connected to each other” (Romans 12:5 GW).

When I became a child of God, I was connected to other believers as their brother or sister.  The Bible says I’m part of a body. What is this body?

Romans 12:5 says, “The body we’re talking about is Christ’s body of chosen people. Each of us finds our meaning and functions as a part of his body. But as a chopped-off finger or cut-off toe we wouldn’t amount to much” (The Message).

My spiritual life does not amount to anything if it’s disconnected from the family of God. If I cut off my finger, it’s not just going to stop growing, it’s also going to die. For my finger to live, it has to be connected to my body. In the same way, I need to be connected to other people in the body of Christ if I want to grow spiritually and fulfill God’s purpose for my life.

A study on mental health revealed that if I isolate myself from others and don’t develop close friendships, like those in a small group, I am three times more likely to die an early death. I’m four times more likely to suffer emotional burnout. I’m five times more likely to be clinically depressed. And I’m ten times more likely to be hospitalized for an emotional or mental disorder.

During the last couple of years, when it’s sometimes been necessary to isolate physically, people have learned to connect in all sorts of creative ways.

Whatever situation I’m in today, find ways to connect to other believers. Become part of the family of God. Join a small group. Get connected. As Ephesians 2:19 says, “You are members of God’s very own family . . . and you belong in God’s household with every other Christian” (TLB).

In summary, Christ makes us all one body and individuals who are connected to each other. The church not only helps me center my life on God, but it also helps me connect with other believers. God did not put me here to live an isolated life. God wants me to learn to love others, and practice loving others in his family. When I became a child of God, I was connected to other believers as their brother or sister. My spiritual life does not amount to anything if it’s disconnected from the family of God. I need to be connected to other people in the body of Christ if I want to grow spiritually and fulfill God’s purpose for my life. So I need to find ways to connect to other believers and become part of the family of God. 

The key to an honest and accurate self-evaluation is knowing the basis of my self-worth, my identity in Christ. Apart from him, I am not capable of very much by eternal standards; I am valuable and capable of worthy service. Evaluating myself by worldly standards of success and achievement can cause me to think too much about my worth in the eyes of others and thus miss my true value in God's eyes. Paul uses the concept of the human body to teach how Christians should live and work together. Just as the parts of the body function under the direction of the brain, so Christians are to work together under the command and authority of Jesus Christ. 

Worship is the Antidote for Worry

In 2 Corinthians 5:14 I read, “[Christ’s] love has the first and last word in everything we do. Our firm decision is to work from this focused center.” (The Message)

God made me for five purposes: worship, fellowship, discipleship, ministry, and evangelism. But I can’t fulfill those purposes on my own. Life is not a solo act. I was created to be in community.

The only way I can fulfill God’s five purposes in my life is with people giving me spiritual input. I need a church family! Why? Because the church helps me center my life around God.

God didn’t put me on Earth to live a self-centered life. He wants to be at the core of my life. He made me to love me, and he wants me to love him back. In a sense, God says, “I want to be the hub of your heart. I want to be the focus of your attention. I want to be the center of your life. I want to be the axis of your existence.”

The Bible says, “[Christ’s] love has the first and last word in everything we do. Our firm decision is to work from this focused center” (2 Corinthians 5:14 The Message).

How can I tell that Christ is at the center of your life? I stop worrying. Philippians 4:6-7 says, “It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life” (The Message).

There’s a word for this: worship. When I focus my life on God, I worship. And worship is the antidote for worry. If I want to worry less, worship more.

When am I supposed to worship? The Bible says, “You have six days when you can do your work, but the seventh day of each week is holy because it belongs to me. No matter where you live, you must rest on the Sabbath and come together for worship” (Leviticus 23:3 CEV). Once a week, God wants me to come together with other believers to refocus, re-calibrate, and recenter my life on him.

Where am I supposed to do it? Acts 2:46 says, “They worshiped together regularly at the Temple” (TLB).

God meant for me to be part of a church family? A church family helps me focus and center my life around God so that I can fulfill his purpose for me.

In summary, Christ’s love has the first and last word in everything I do. My decision is to work from this focused center. God made me for five purposes: worship, fellowship, discipleship, ministry, and evangelism. But I can’t fulfill those purposes on my own. I was created to be in community with others. I need others to give me spiritual input. The church helps me center my life around God. God didn’t put me on Earth to live a self-centered life. He wants to be at the core of my life. God says, “I want to be the hub of your heart, the focus of my attention, and the center of my life. How can I tell that Christ is at the center of my life? I stop worrying. There’s a word for this: worship. When I focus my life on God, I worship. And worship is the antidote for worry. When am I supposed to worship? Once a week, God wants me to come together with other believers to refocus, re-calibrate, and recenter my life on him. Where am I to worship,  at the church. God meant for me to be part of a church family? A church family helps me focus and center my life around God so that I can fulfill his purpose for me.

Everything that Paul and his companions did was to honor God. Not only did fear of God motivate them, but Christ's love controlled their actions. The word for "controls'' means "to hold fast." In other words, the love of Christ was constraining them to certain courses of action. They knew that Jesus, out of his great love, had given up his life for their sake. He had not acted out of his own self-interest, selfishly holding on to the glory of heaven that he already possessed. Instead, Jesus had willingly "died for everyone." Because Christ died for me, I’m also dead to my old life. Like Paul, I should no longer live to please myself; I should spend my life pleasing Christ. 

God Shaped Me for Service

In Ephesians 2:10 I read, “God has made us what we are. In Christ Jesus, God made us to do good works, which God planned in advance for us to live our lives doing.” (NCV)

God shaped me to serve him.

The Bible says, “God has made us what we are. In Christ Jesus, God made us to do good works, which God planned in advance for us to live our lives doing” (Ephesians 2:10 NCV).

Before I was even born, God decided what contribution he wanted me to make with my life. God didn’t put me on this planet just to take up space. He put me here to serve him by serving others.

And nobody else can be me. If I don’t serve God the way he intended for me to serve him, then the world misses out.

Another name for “good works” is “ministry.” Any time I use my talents and abilities to help somebody else, I am ministering to them. The Bible says in 1 Peter 4:10, “God has given each of you some special abilities; be sure to use them to help each other, passing on to others God’s many kinds of blessings” (TLB).

The talents that I have are not for my benefit. God gave me my talents for the benefit of other people. Nobody has it all together; God wired the universe so that we would need each other.

God wants me to practice here on Earth what I’ll be doing in heaven. In heaven, I’m going to love God and love others, so he wants me to practice that now.

I’m going to grow spiritually and serve God in heaven, so he wants me to practice this on Earth. Since it’s impossible to serve God directly on Earth, I serve him here by serving others. In fact, God says that any time I help somebody else, it’s like I’m doing it for him.

I serve God when I serve others.

In summary, God has made me who I am. God made me so that I could do good works, which God planned in advance for me to live my life doing. God shaped me to serve him. Before I was even born, God decided what contribution he wanted me to make with my life. God didn’t put me here just to take up space. He put me here to serve him by serving others. Nobody else can be me. If I don’t serve the way he intended for me to serve, then the world misses out. Any time I use my talents and abilities to help somebody else, I am ministering to them. The talents that I have are not for my benefit. God gave me my talents for the benefit of others. Nobody has it all together; God wired the universe so that we would need each other. God wants me to practice here on Earth what I’ll be doing in heaven. In heaven, I’m going to love God and love others, so he wants me to practice that now. I’m going to grow spiritually and serve God in heaven, so he wants me to practice this on Earth. I serve him here by serving others. Any time I help somebody else, it’s like I’m doing it for him. I serve God when I serve others.

I became a Christian through God's unmerited grace, not as a result of any effort, ability, intelligent choice, or act of service on my part. Out of gratitude for this free gift, I should seek to help and serve others with kindness, love, and gentleness, and not merely to please myself. While there is no action or work I can do that can help me obtain salvation, God's intention is that my salvation results in acts of service. I am not merely saved for my own benefit but to serve Christ and build up the church. I am God's work of art and workmanship. My salvation is something only God could do. It is his powerful, creative work within me. If God considers me his workmanship, then I dare not treat myself or others with disrespect or as inferior work.